Lumps of fat
by Akely
Summary: Kagura adventures into enemy territory: Okita's bedroom.


Sex.

At fourteen years old Kagura wasn't much of a hormonal beast, but hearing her friends talking about 'sex' rendered her curious. Ayu-chan always described 'sex' as a very pleasurable, tiring and addicting act.

Ayumi Sarugawa was a female friend of Kagura. Unlike the chinese-like girl, she was blessed with a mature body despite being only one year older and naturally, boys came to her like bees with honey. From Kagura's entourage, Ayumi was the most experienced when it came to men.

Recently Ayu-chan had been saying she and her new boyfriend had a very nice body compatibility, something that made 'sex' better or worse, at least that was what she said.

If it was about body compatibility, the closest Kagura had was with a black-wearing boy. Not that they had anything coming close to a couple. Simply speaking it was a different kind of compatibility that resided in striking and dodging continuously until exhaustion, yet the sparring was always satisfying for both party. For Kagura, because she could release all the extra-energy she had as a Yato, for Okita because he could relieve himself from his job and prevent his body from getting dull.

And if it was about bodys, then surely both of them matched each other. Kagura had no apparent muscles, a flat stomach at most, yet she sustained a supernatural strength that far surpassed the humans'. Okita was toned like a samurai though less than Gintoki, but he could take her on anytime and with skills and speed, he made a very honorable rival to Kagura.

So, without doubt, they did have body compatibility in their own way. But when idly thinking about it, munching slowly on a sukonbu, Kagura realized she had never thought of Okita as something more than a rival she loved to hate. Ayumi and lot of her friends always squealed at the mention of his name, apparently was the man attractive, mysterious, and hot.

But really, all Kagura could see was a barking Chihuahua.

Well. To be fair, he wasn't bad on the eyes either — call her a liar if she said the opposite. A round but attractive face, sharp eyes of red tint and silky flaxen hair with long legs of a mannequin; Okita Sougo was rather a hunk than a bump. It just that she never saw him as a man. Sure, she knew he had something she didn't in-between his legs but that was there was to it.

Kagura rolled on the wooden bench, dreamily staring at the sky.

She had never been good at romance and stuff like that, but what was sex? Was it really as good as Ayumi-chan said?

Kagura was decided. In order to understand what 'sex' is she needed to gather more data, and who better to infiltrate than her pinpointed rival Okita?

It was a mission. An infiltration in enemy's zone, well-guarded and dangerous, but all the more fun to challenge its security.

She'll just need to learn some tricks from Catherine, after all the woman had been a thief most of her life.

Sasasasasa…. The sound of the wind blasting upon being cut by a fast Yato.

Bon! Strong legs that successfully ended on the upper-side of the fence protecting the Shinsengumi headquarters. For policemen Kagura thought the security was lacking; only a few recruits keeping their eyes on the HQ and she betted they were newbies that couldn't be assigned to a division yet.

It was a warm afternoon, the sun rested high in the sky and a pleasant wind flew, a perfect time to nap when one was called Okita Sougo. Kagura chuckled at the picture of him covered of a weird eye mask while sleeping on their usual bench all while his division patrolled in his stead.

Idiot. He left his bedroom unguarded of Kagura Lupin III! Big mistake, she grinned and slipped in the yard just before Okita's room. It was her first time coming in but the strong smell of Tabasco and occult emanated from it; at least to her skilled nose.

It reeked of his smell, but Kagura found the room almost too normal to be her rival's. She slid the door just to find a clean, simple bedroom with the futon rolled in a corner, a low table and few amenities. No whip, no vodoo or dark magic objects in sight.

"Wow. Who would have known Sadist was like Shinpachi?" Kagura deadpanned alone and stepped in, where would the Sadist hide his secret stash of porn? Gin-chan had some too, badly hidden in his futon but she never bothered reading them when the man was an old MADAO, probably virgin and in all nothing she'd like to learn from. She bet his porn contained lot of old grandma like the white-haired old man he was and seeing these grandmas weren't in her interest either.

If it was Shinpachi, he would hide in a classic spot: somewhere in corner of a closet.

Kagura did just as so, opening the closet that had mostly clothes and weapon-related items as well as files, her hands rummaged in a dark spot and grabbed what looked like books.

Right here. Boys' legendary secret stash of porn! The Bible to 'sex'!

Okita had bothered to put few volumes of JUMPs on them but nothing could escape her great sight.

Kagura mentally patted herself and opened the first book she found, the title was too long for her to read — she was very slow — but it had 'SM' on its cover.

"!"

The book started quickly, a we-endowed female entered an odd building resembling a castle. There were dungeons, but Kagura quickly understood that their aims deviated from real ones as there were a lot of naked people.

"Sadist likes this kind of stuff? He really is a sadist." Her face unwavering by the obscenities continued through the pages and books.

Whatever Ayumi-chan had said, Kagura decided to not listen anymore. 'Sex' was nothing but humans rutting together (sometimes with more than one partner), lot of noises and yells, body fluids… In all the act was pretty disgusting and the girls looked crazier than happy.

Disappointment.

Kagura sighed and put back the books, her mind bothered by something she couldn't understand, something making her anger flaring up.

Were boobs so nice? She knew Gin-chan and Shinpachi loved them, but to Kagura they were nothing more than two lumps of fat. What made them so attractive was beyond her, but somehow it seemed Sadist liked them big and it created an odd feeling of discomfort in her.

She felt like Otae, observing a rather poor chest. Like a kid's.

Maybe she should start drinking soja milk too?

Why would that matter anyway, it wasn't like she wanted to impress the Sadist. She just needed his stash for… Next sparring, ah yes, sparring. They weren't like Ayumi-chan and her boyfriend nor did she want to have anything close to rutting with him — ew to the sadist cooties.

But really. She wasn't jealous.

Does size really matter? Kagura sat down and hid her face in her knees, surges of anger and disappointment invading her. It wasn't her fault if at fourteen, she didn't have a body like Ayumi-chan's, or these girls in the books.

If she had a big chest, would Okita treat her better? Would he look at her differently, like how the men in the books looked at the heroine?

Size did matter after all.

She'll Shinpachi tomorrow for soja milk, she'll let him see, this sadist, if she couldn't grow those lumps of fat.

* * *

Might start a lemony drabbles about Okita teaching Kagura about sex later. Let's see if my maths doesn't kill me first lol


End file.
